Hair (6/08/05)

Dear Zelda,

Lucky dog! You've got hair all over. I have hardly any hair left on my head but I'm trying to cover up the truth. My wife says a comb-over style may work okay for Donald Trump, but not for me. My wife also tells me that bald is beautiful. I'm not convnced. What do you think?

Cue Ball

Dear Cue Ball,

It's time for you to get out from behind the 8-ball. Take the cue from your wife and put down your comb and pick up your razor. I'm with your wife, bald men get my tail wagging. Make it a special occasion and invite your wife out for a fancy dinner. Don't tell her in advance about your new look, just come out of the bathroom head shorn and dressed to the nines.

Today there are more than 40 million men in the U.S. who are affected by male pattern baldness. About 10 million of them start going bald by the age of 30. I'm assuming you don't have enough hair left to try transplants (moving hairs from one part of the scalp to another) or other treatments. So, just go for it.

After all, do you think Michael Jordan could have scored all those points without a streamlined head? Do you think Bruce Willis would have been named one of People magazine's "Sexiest Men Alive" if bald wasn't beautiful? Don't let your hair get in your way. Bald IS beautiful and brainy and brawny. You can't beat the look and you won't have to fight your wife over who gets the hair dryer!


Dear Zelda,

Every time I look in the mirror I see more gray hairs. Many of my friends have their hair colored to hide the gray. Should I succumb and let my hair go gray or should I stay the brunette that I've always been? By the way, I'm 47 years old and don't feel ready to resemble my gray-haired granny.

Born a Brunette

Dear Born,

Go back to your roots! Your brunette roots, that is. Some people may say you look just fine as a granny wannabe, but what counts is how you feel. You'll feel more youthful, attractive and confident when you're not worried that you appear to be much older than you really are.

You can color your hair yourself or have it done professionally. Either way, you can choose to use a hair dye with natural ingredients if you're sensitive to chemicals. Me? I'd go with the best professional around. Have fun with it. By adding highlights to your hair you may also be adding some highlights to your life.

When in doubt, think of the late Julia Child. She dyed her hair red to the very end of her 91 years. No one ever called the feisty French Chef "Granny"! It's AARF not AARP.


Dear Zelda,

You have short hair, but my golden retriever, Bailey, has long hair that he manages to shed with some regularity. I have a friend who won't let me bring Bailey to her house because of the shedding. What can I do?

Owner of the Super Shedder

Dear Owner,

First, I'd get rid of the friend, but then I'm a dog. To me a house is not a home without dog hair. My owner likes to say, "Love me, love my dog". Now back to the shedding, your golden retriever's got nothing on me when it comes to shedding. In fact, some short-haired dogs, such as yours truly, shed more than their long-haired cousins. Personally I wouldn't trust a dog who doesn't shed.

But enough about me. Let's look at Bailey's problem, which is actually (surprise!) your problem. Because if you relent and decide you really want to take Bailey to your friend's house, you're the one who will have to make Bailey the perfect guest. To do that you'll have to take Bailey to a groomer on a regular basis or bathe him yourself. You'll need to brush him every day so the loose hairs come out in the brush, not in your friend's living room. A curry comb actually works best. With a little elbow grease on your part, Bailey will be welcome everywhere.


PS. Just a little tidbit of canine hair information that I recently learned and want to pass along; Petkin Inc. has announced new hair-growth aids (ItchStick, ItchStop Wipes, and ItchStop Swabs) to help treat canine baldness. The products are supposed to help pets grow back lost fur and to prevent further loss by treating the underlying itchy skin disorders.