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Dear Zelda, I really want a tummy tuck but am terrified of plastic surgery and turned off by the extreme makeovers. All I really want is a mini tuck to help a little... nothing drastic or extreme or perfect. What’s your opinion? Do I keep trying (after fifteen years) to lose those last 10 pounds or go under the knife? I’d love to hear your opinion. Less Than Perfect in Florida Dear Less Than Perfect, Doesn’t “tummy tuck” sound nice and easy... like some yoga position, or a new way to fold a napkin? It sure sounds a lot better than elective surgery where you’re cut open, vacuumed out, and have your skin stretched and sutured to remove those “last ten pounds.” It’s all well and good to see it on television, where weeks of recovery occur during the commercial break, but going through it yourself is another matter. Personally, my idea of a tummy tuck is squeezing into a pair of jeans for a photo shoot! Being healthy and happy DOESN’T require being perfect. In fact, always striving for physical perfection is a guaranteed way to never be happy. That said, I do understand how troubling it can be to have that one bit of anatomy that just won’t obey and go away. We’re all human (so to speak), and sometimes we have little things that bother us to no end. So here’s how I would break it down. If it’s a matter of weight, and you want to lose those last ten pounds and get in better shape, you should keep working to achieve it through diet and exercise (more on this later). Tummy tucks, mini tummy tucks and liposuction are not good weight-loss strategies; they are intended to reshape a specific part of your body. So if your tummy won’t disappear with a diet, then I’d say surgery may be a reasonable option, particularly if it will make you happier. What you need to decide is whether this is about fitness and weight loss, or about changing something specific and cosmetic about yourself. Of course, while I’m a true certified therapy dog, I’m not qualified to give any medical advice, so you’ll need to talk to a qualified, board-certified doctor about the pros and cons of different choices. If you decide you’d rather continue to try dieting, my personal favorite strategy for moderate weight loss is called Zelda’s ‘Last Ten Pounds’ Diet. Believe me, everyone who has tried it has lost ten pounds, and the expense will be significantly less than the thousands a surgical tummy tuck would cost. In fact, you need only a few items: a scale, ten plastic zip-lock bags, and, get ready for this... ten pounds of fat. Yes, you’ll need to shop around for a friendly butcher who will gladly give you the fat... free. Have the butcher place one pound of fat in each of the zip-lock bags. You’ll be amazed at the amount, and motivated to lose it. Gross? YES! But that’s the point. Take the ten bags home and place them prominently in your refrigerator. From that day on, Zelda’s ‘Last Ten Pounds’ Diet begins. Think thin. Think about those fat baggies and how good it will feel when you lose that first pound and can transfer a bag from the fridge to the freezer. Weigh yourself every day, and write down your progress. Lose a pound? Freezer reward. Gain a pound? Move that frozen fat baggie back to the fridge. If you want even more motivation, stick that frozen baggie in your pants, wear it around, and feel double the pain from your gain. Of course, you have to eat well and exercise regularly for this diet to work, but those fat baggies will serve as a constant reminder of what it’s costing you every time you raid the fridge. When you’ve lost those ten pounds, let me know and send me a photo. Whether or not you decide to go through with the surgery, you’d be well advised to continue making a healthy diet and regular exercise part of your daily life. But then again, wouldn’t we all? Zelda Dear Zelda, How do you keep the folds on your face so clean? My bullies’ eyes tear and they have stains which I cannot remove. I clean them every day with baby wipes and aloe. I want my bullies to look cute like you. Your fans, Pickles and Dozer Dear Pickles and Dozer, Let’s face it, though bulldogs are beautiful, tear stains are not. Tear stains are common problems not only for bulldogs, but also for many other breeds with white or light-colored fur. The stains can be caused by health and diet as well as genetics. It’s my recommendation that you first consult your veterinarian. Sometimes bacterial and yeast infections are involved, and your vet can prescribe medication to treat these infections. The tear stains could also be the result of water or food sources. Check the ingredients in your dog food. Wheat, corn and dairy products could be the culprits. Look for a healthy, natural dog food like Royal Canin Medium (made specifically for bulldogs), Blue Buffalo, or better yet, ask your owner to prepare your food from ‘scratch’ using healthy ingredients and vitamin supplements. One of my pals, a foxy little Bichon named Dujac, suffered from tear stains and now he swears by Angels’ Eyes (www.angelseyes.com). Dujac says the tear stains disappeared right before his very eyes and the company claims that by adding a little of this powder to your daily dog food, your eyes will go from tear to clear. Personally I haven’t tried it, but their success stories seem to support their claim. So you’re not really in a pickle, Pickle. Just follow my advice and tell Dozer to keep his eyes wide open to the possibility of getting rid of those nasty tear stains. All in favor say “EYE!” Zelda Bulldogs are Beautiful Day is April 28th 2008. Celebrate your beauty by bragging that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that beauty comes in all sizes, shapes and hues. Most importantly, beauty comes from within. Share this column with a friend! |
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