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Dear Zelda, Our family has a very old dog that has been part of our family even before our two children were born. Now our children are three and five and, Sadie, our beloved 15 year old Golden Retriever, is having some serious health problems. I know the end is near for Sadie but how do I handle this with our young children? I truly need your advice. Before Bereavement Dear Before, It is hard to explain death and dying to young children. In fact it sounds like Sadie’s potential for passing may be the first time you will need to discuss this immutable law of nature with them. It is always best to be honest with children in a caring and compassionate manner when discussing death. They need to understand the permanence of death. A simple explanation about the cycle of life will help prepare your children for the loss of Sadie when the time comes. There are also several books that help children understand the loss of a beloved pet and Amazon.com gives good reviews of each book to help you determine which books suit your children’s situation: I’ll Always Love You by Hans Wilhelm The Forever Dog by Bill Cochran The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst Dog Heaven by Cynthia Rylant Another good website that deals with grief support is the Morris Animal Foundation’s site: http://www.morisanimalfoundation.org Coming straight from this dog’s mouth let me conclude by saying that it is important to allow all members of your family an opportunity to say good bye to Sadie beforehand. I’m such an old dog that my owner has been practicing saying good bye to me for many years. I savor all the times she tells me how much she loves me and all the tummy rubs and kisses I’ve been given just because she knows that one day I won’t be here. Share some sensitive straight talk with your children and let them spend time loving and saying good bye to Sadie with a positive pooch approach. Zelda Hi Zelda, I am a white-faced English Bulldog with tear stain issues. My mom wipes my face daily with baby wipes, but they do not remove the red stains. She is leery about using anything with stronger chemicals. While my mom knows your face isn’t white, you may have a white-faced bully friend with the same issues. Looking forward to your “wise” suggestions. Major L.B.Fenway Dear MAJOR, Actually as I’ve aged the white hairs have invaded, and now I have a lot of white fur around my eyes. I like to think it makes me look more distinguished, perhaps a little like a wise senior senator. But when I first started to notice those ugly red tear stains I panicked and consulted a good friend of mine. Dujac is a handsome, white Bichon Frise whose owner is picture-perfect and who wanted her dog to be just as picture- perfect. She did some research and found a product that claimed to get rid of red tear stains from the inside out. The product is called Angels’ Eyes Tear Stain Eliminator www.amazon.com. She checked the ingredients with her veterinarian and once he approved, (no strong chemicals!), she started sprinkling the designated amount on Dujac’s food. Within four weeks the red fur around his eyes became bright white. It has been a couple of years now and his owner exclaims, “I would consider Angels’ Eyes a miracle.” Angels’ Eyes has worked for Dujac and me. But before you try it, check with your veterinarian to make sure your tear stains aren’t due to an undiagnosed medical condition. If your veterinarian gives you the go ahead then try some Angels’ Eyes and I think you’ll find a MAJOR improvement along with no more fear of tear stains. Zelda Share this column with a friend! |
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